ANNE SLIGHT - Wedding Celebrant, Whangamata

View Original

Ten Wedding Ritual Ideas to include in your Ceremony

Rituals are an important part of a wedding ceremony, and the most common ritual in Western society is the exchanging of rings. A ring is a circle with no beginning or end, so it represents infinity and therefore the never-ending nature of the love you have for each other. However, there are many other rituals and traditions associated with the marriage ceremony. You may choose to include one of these instead of, or in addition to, the exchanging of rings. Some of these rituals are associated with different cultures and historical practices. A search of the Internet will bring up plenty of options. Here are some examples to get you started:

1. Unity Candle Ceremony:  On a table at the front of the ceremony two lit candles sit on either side of single unlit candle. At the end of the ceremony each of you picks up a lit candle, or uses those candles to light tapers, then light the central unlit candle together, symbolising your unity and oneness.

2. Sand Ceremony: You each hold a container of sand representing your individual lives. These individual containers of sand are then poured into a larger empty container symbolising the merging of your lives into one. The individual grains of sand can never again be separated from each other. Different coloured sands work really well for this ritual. If you are merging two family units, this can be a nice way of including the children––each child contributes their own container of sand, symbolising that you are all now part of one family. The filled container is kept as a memento of your commitment.

3. Blessing of the Hands: As you take each other’s hands, your celebrant or one of your guests reads a poem about what this means to you. A particularly lovely poem is Blessing of the Hands by Rev. Daniel L. Harris.

4. Handfasting (also known as Binding of the Hands): This ritual is Celtic in origin and was common in medieval Western Europe. It normally involves the loose tying of your right hands with a ribbon or cord and symbolises your coming together and remaining bound together.

5. Unity Wine Ceremony: The couple shares a cup of wine promising that they will share everything in their joint future. The sweetness of the wine symbolises that life will be sweeter for you because you will be spending it with your loved one and whatever bitterness exists in the wine will be less because it is shared.

6. Tree Planting Ritual: Planting a tree in the ground or pot is a symbol life, hope, growth and continuity. As each of the couple grows or changes, like the tree, you do so together and not separately.

7. Tying the Knot: Using large coloured cords, you tie a knot (a fisherman’s knot is best), while the celebrant  reads a commentary along the lines of ‘like this knot, marriage strengthens and supports the couple through life and, like the knot, their marriage grows stronger under pressure’.

8. Make a Time Capsule: Create a marriage time capsule that you open at a specified date in the future. Fill it will things, thoughts feeling that are important to you right now.

9. Red String of Fate: An East Asian tradition, whereby the gods tie a red cord around the ankles or little fingers of those who are to be bound together. The two people connected by the red thread are destined to be lovers, regardless of time, place, or circumstances. This magical cord may stretch or tangle, but never break. 

10. Truce Bell: A bell is rung on the wedding day, the happiest day of the your lives and then placed in a central location in the home. The idea is, if you start to argue one of you rings the bell to remind you both of that wedding day happiness and mark a truce.