Make your wedding day as special as possible by including your children in the ceremony.

If you and your partner already have kids together, or if this is your second marriage and there are children from a previous relationship, then it’s natural that you’d want them to be a part of your wedding ceremony. Ask your kids how they’d feel most comfortable taking part and find an age-appropriate way to include them. Here are a few ideas for including them in your ceremony. Whatever you decide, be relaxed about it, because on the day the kids may have different ideas, especially if they’re littlies!  But that’s all part of the fun.

1. Make them bridesmaids and groomsmen

There’s no rule that says your bridal party has to be all adults, so why not let your kids be bridesmaids or groomsmen? This idea works especially well if your children are too old to be flower girls or page boys.

2. Have them as your flower girl /page boy/ ring bearer

This is a great way to include younger children. The classic, kid-friendly roles of flower girl, page boy and ring bearer are simple, fun and always a crowd-pleaser. And the children will love the opportunity to dress up as part of the bridal party.

3. Include them in a Unity ceremony

If you’re having a unity candle, sand ceremony, tree planting or other ritual, this is the perfect chance to involve your kids. By getting married, you really are making one big family, or reaffirming the existing family, so it makes total sense to give them a special role. Let them help light the candle, include multiple sand colours, or come up with something totally new and creative that’s unique to you.

4. Give them a special gift

You can give them a special gift before the ceremony, or include it in your ceremony similar to the bride and groom exchanging rings. It may be a necklace, pendant, brooch, or even their own ring. It will be something they cherish forever, and a special time for you to express how much they mean to you and how excited you are to take on this new family role.

5. Mention them in your vows

Recognising your kids in the vows is an easy way to make them feel included and special. It’s also a way to remind them that you’re committing to being a family––the wedding is about all of you.

6. Have them walk you down the aisle

Whoever walks you down the aisle doesn’t have to be your dad or parents. Have one or all of your kids walk you to the altar to make your procession extra-meaningful. This works really well for older children.

7. Have them give a reading, poem, sing, or play an instrument

If your kids are happy to get up in front of people, or if they have a special talent, you could incorporate this into the ceremony. A simple heart-felt poem or reading is always special, or perhaps a musical solo while the documents are being signed. Giving your children a moment in the spotlight will be something they’ll always remember.

8. Make the most of the photo opportunity

If the kids are part of the ceremony, you’ll get some wonderful photos which you’ll all cherish. You could even include them in ‘first look’ photos, if you’re having them.

9. Have back-up!

Especially if young children or babies are involved, try to have back-up––mums, aunties and older children can be especially useful. It’s not the end of the world if you’re holding a crying baby while you exchange your vows, but you’ll be much more relaxed if you can call for help.

10. Warning ....

There’s a reason why the saying “Never work with Children or Animals” has stuck. They are scene stealing and completely unpredictable! But they will also make your special day that much more special.